


Hospital visit

by Justmereachingforstars



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, Post voltron season 7
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-16
Updated: 2018-08-16
Packaged: 2019-06-28 12:09:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15706941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Justmereachingforstars/pseuds/Justmereachingforstars
Summary: There was some talking long overdue





	Hospital visit

**Author's Note:**

> Just had to get this thing off my chest, my writing is probably a bit rusty and man am I tired this is probably a mess I apologize in advance it's 3 am

Keith opened his eyes as he awoke from his restless sleep, the light outside still too bright to not hurt his head. He could feel it throbbing with that thought, and brought a hand up to where his bandages have been. Sleep has never really been a friend of his and especially short after a long fight it felt unsafe to rest too long. Unsafe to not make sure his surroundings are still friendly.

  
He looked around his room only to find Krolia and Kolivan silently talking, making sure to not disturb him.

  
Once she realized that he was awake her face broke into a soft smile that spread on her face almost comfortably.

  
In the beginning, when they met, she never smiled, she was like the rest of the blades, stoic, focused on the mission. A face that looked like its only ever seen war.

  
But when they were stuck on that planet creature and started to learn about one another she became softer around the edges, her eyes weren't as sharp, her tone held more heart.

  
It wasn't until they really got talking, months into their travel, that she really started to show emotions. He wasn't much different.  
Both of them not one to easily trust and open up, even if this person was family. After all family didn't mean anything if you've never met them. It's still a stranger.

  
But over the time he learnt to open up to her and she started telling Keith tales of his father, of her time at the blades, of her excitement to see the blue lion and her pride to find out that her son was a paladin.

  
She confessed to thinking of him in her time as a teacher to younger blades. Keith mentioned his longing for a parent all his life and how Shiro took over that role for him. It was then that he couldn't stop talking about them. His family.

  
Keith told her about Shiro and how the man only ever saw the best in him, believed in him and helped him overcome many of his troubles.

  
He told her about Pidge, the paladin that, even though he doesn't exactly understand when they get into explaining their passions, has become like a little sibling to him.

  
About Hunk he told her of his courage. About how he was one of the people who missed his family a lot but never mentioned it to others. But instead spent his time learning everything he could about the worlds around him.

  
Of course Keith told her about Allura and Coran, the people who made them paladins in the first place and his wonder over a culture and technology so different from all he had ever known.

  
And then there was Lance. How could he not regale his mother about this boy who managed to gain his attention and was then unable to let him go.

  
Well at first it was just normal stories about the paladins but he couldn't help it. He kept telling her about him, the way they used to tease one another, the way Lance believed in him as well. The way Keith trusted him with his life and how he was ready to leave all of it for him.

  
It was then at their most open that they had the conversation about her leaving. How she hated having to leave him and how it broke her heart, especially now knowing that he felt abandoned because of it.

  
It was in that moment that Keith decided that he could have this woman in his life. They both had a hole that needed filling.They both longed for a family. His mother leaving hers on earth, him leaving his on the castle ship.

  
He had smiled at her then, called her mother instead of her name and her answering smile warmed his heart in a way he would never get used to.

  
Now, years into their relationship smiles and hugs come easily. It took him years to say I love you back to her but now it feels right, comforting.

  
"What do you say, Keith. Does your injury feel better today?", Krolia said softly, almost hopeful. She had been pacing a lot as has been Kolivan. Them being alien and family to a paladin had certain risks for their safety. But still, it felt wrong to have to sit around all day just to be discharged. It did remind him of a restless cat thought.

  
He couldn't help but chuckle, really.

  
"I know you’re anxious to get out of here, so am I.”, he said with a smile, “Sadly I don't get a say in how good I'm doing.", Keith looked around once more, almost anxiously. He didn't like being confined either. It felt wrong to be forced to stay at a place after so long of moving as he pleased. The military really never was for him. He was always one to break rules.

  
"If I had it my way we’d be out of here a week ago"

  
Whether it was only the doctors or if the garrison wanted them confined longer than needed he isn’t sure, at this point he doesn’t care. It’s just a bother, really.

  
“Yeah but then your thick head would explode or something. Cant believe you wanted to go all ninja mullet head basically a few days after you almost died”

  
His head whipped around so fast he has to hold his head for a second, it throbbing violently again this time from motion and surprise. When he does look up it’s only to put his gaze on the door to see Lance standing in all his cocked hip, eyebrow raised glory.

  
“I mean come on I get you surely wanted to go back to adventuring as you do but take small steps, try going out of your room for one.” He was obviously teasing but it didn’t feel right, forced even.

  
His face was closed off, trying hard not to sound accusing but Keith could hear it anyways, they had gotten quite good at reading each other before, well, he left.

  
He hadn’t exactly visited anyone after Shiro was discharged for good. Sure he went to see if Pidge and Allura were fine, even took a second to check in with Hunk but, yeah maybe he didn’t visit Lance.

  
It wasn’t that he didn’t want to see him, god did he want to. Sometimes it was the only thing he could think of but there was too much that kept him basically strapped to his bed zoning out and thinking of could’ve been’s.

  
And there was Lance's family always by his side and he didn’t really feel like he belonged in a room with them. They all had this energy about them, this connection as a family that felt wrong to intrude in.

  
Also, the only time he passed the room while his family was gone.

  
Well Allura had sat at his bedsite talking to him.

  
And it’s not like he disliked Allura, far from it. She’s amazing and a valued part of the team it’s just that Lance thinks she is so much more. He keeps making these heart eyes and at some point it gets too hard to handle. He had to look at them all the time back when he lived with them and it’s the only thing he didn’t miss when he was gone.

  
Of course he could’ve tried again instead of sulking but some immature part of him didn’t want to feel that certain way when he saw them that day. That way.

  
Close, comfortable, happy. Everything they never were or are going to be.

  
He knows he’s jealous, and god does he hate it, it’s not a pretty feeling. Knowing what it is doesn’t make it easier to handle though. He still cant handle himself around people who bring forth this vile part of himself. Making him feel like he’s trying to make sure Lance doesn’t get love just because its not his, it’s not fair for Lance.

  
“I’ve been out, the whole hospital is just suffocating.”, his voice was gruff, defensive. He keeps doing this. Pushing Lance away when caught surprised by his emotions.

  
Lance just has it in him to surprise him and whatever it was that he wanted to say gets blown away in a mess of ‘god I love him' and ‘fUckfuckfuckFucK'. Fuck feelings to be honest, he was awkward before, being caught off guard just makes it worse. Especially since he never was one to care about what people thought of him but suddenly he cares so so much and it makes him fuck up all the time.

  
The subject of his suffering just stood at the door looking at him with a strange look in his eyes. Something about him felt off, he stood staring right at him without saying a word, His cool façade starting to break as they basically gazed into each others eyes. Lance was trying hard to keep his eyes on him, his hands fumbling with the hem of his hospital gown's sleeve but he was nothing if not stubborn.

  
“How about Kolivan and I go for a walk, this having to wait for clearance to leave the premises really makes your skin crawl right? Right, we’ll just find somewhere to, yeah, walk.”, Krolia interrupted them not caring for their shocked faces,  bot of them shocked of having forgotten the other two in the room. She has the subtlety of a train. As embarrassed he was about forgetting about them he’s greatful for a chance to talk to Lance, after all this time it is probably way overdue.

  
As they started to leave Krolia made sure to give Keith a face, one of encouragement or amusement he isn’t sure. Kolivan tried to keep an amused play of his lips under control but with time Keith could tell when the he was being made fun of.

  
He didn’t like it.

  
Lance actually entered the room then, uncomfortable and nervous. He kept his eyes on his hands while he sat down next to Keith’s bed and interlaced them carefully.  
They fell into a tense silence, none willing to start a conversation but both having a lot to say. It was loaded and dangerous in it’s way crawling in his skin.

  
Keith didn’t really know what to say.

  
Sorry for not going to visit you because even though I was so worried about you I felt like I was the last person you wanted to see at the moment

  
Sorry for probably making you feel like I don’t want you in the team when you are the main reason I manage to lead them.

  
Sorry for leaving and possibly destroying the only chance we might’ve had because we actually got along for a short while, I held most of your attention and now it seems I’ve lost it forever.

  
Sorry fo-

  
“stop that”

  
the whisper was soft, almost too silent for the normal human ear. The softness of it brought his attention back to Lances face.

  
“you’re overthinking something and it’s getting in the way of your main thinking again.”

  
He was looking at Keith with a serious expression, taking him in. Almost like checking for injuries.

  
He took a careful breath before his cool eyes turned to ice in a face that could only be described as determined.

  
“Let me give this to you straight, heh, like let me just say this and I’ll leave, I promise.”, Lance's voice was soft yet strong. All no bullshit attitude, it sent a shiver down his spine. He was already stiff as if ready to bolt the second he got whatever this was off his chest.

  
“I’ve spent a lot of time while in this hospital thinking of how to tell you this and have talked to Allura and actually got a way to formulate this.”

  
Oh no, hell no, please no is he here to like announce that they are like dating or leaving if something does this belong to duties of a team leader it shouldn’t. Keith really isn't ready to hear anything like that, he though he was but he as wrong.

  
“Whatever it is I-“

  
“No.”

  
Their eyes met again, both tense and uncomfortable, staring each other down like animals.

  
“No you will listen to this and what you do after is your thing but I won’t let you go without having spoken my mind. Our relationship has changed much over time and I cant help but see that we’ve come back to a point where it seems that we just cant be friends, you know.”

  
Keith sat up as straight as he could barely able to process what was happening. Was lance suggesting to be even less than friends now, is their connection really that far gone, never to be touched upon again is this where they end is this really Lance letting him go without knowing it.

  
“Like for a while I thought we were actually getting really close”, the other paladin went back to looking at his hands slowly moving his thumb over his skin in a calming way, “and I got it into me that we might-anyways I see now that after two years things change I guess and that in the end we’re not the same we used to be.”

  
What the fuck is actually happening right now. Is Lance breaking up with him before they got together or is this some fancy rejection. How did be find out Keith always made sure to not ge obviously lost when with him.

  
“Lance, please-“

  
“-And I was ready to accept that! Ready to move on because I cant keep hanging onto something that will just never-after the whole Acxa thing I don’t even know it’s just that-Keith no let me finish this then you can throw me out”

  
Keith had tried to interrupt him but Lances stance was riggid, defensive, he was talking fast and just trying to rid himself of something as if he was at a confessional. It was like he was forcing his way through it, as if he’d rather swallow a handful of rocks than sit here with him and talk about this.

  
He took a deep breath in, “It’s just that I can’t let go of you! It’s that when I was out there, looking death in the eye again I had to think of no one but your mullet haired person can you believe that!”, a sound close go a chocked chuckle forced itself out of Lances throat. “My family, the paladins, the princess, Anyone! It was you!”

  
Lance was starting to rant more than to explain as he said, “ Can you imagine how fucked up for me it is to stand there and all I can think of is that I once again missed my last chance of telling you-telling you that you know-even though last time already I told myself to not wait for more chances because this is war but then you came back and I couldn’t help but feel that-I don’t know, that you wouldn’t like me back after all even thought I was sure that we were getting closer but my whole point is that when I heard your voice over the com I knew I wanted to tell you and in those seconds after red saved me I felt like she had given me one last chance to do this as one of my biggest regrets was that I didn’t get to see your face when I told you that I love you!”

  
Ice surrounded Keith in that moment. Everything seemed to happen a bit slower as he let those words repeat over and over.  
Lances breath was heavy and fast, his eyes filling with tears as he tried to force himself to look Keith in the face. To see Keith’s face as he told him that he loved him, loved him, that he love him, that he LOVED HIM

  
The silence stretched as Keith tried to process whatever it was that just happened, this rant, confession thing. But the longer Keith didn’t react the more Lance's face fell.

  
“should’ve guessed”, Lance barely breathed out. “I’ll just see myself out.”

  
He didn’t make it to the door before Keith grabbed his arm, head swimming by the speed of him standing up.

  
“Wait!! Wait no no, no listen, ok listen no this yes I mean yeah! Like no-please sit, I mean can I maybe, also say something? “

  
The eyes that looked back at him were filled with shock, tear trails visible and heartbreakingly so. Keith felt the urge to brush over them and hold this boy in front of him.

  
“Please Lance I’m sorry I made you feel this way but I need you to hear me out I really, please”, he begged and Keith wasn’t one for begging but the chance of losing Lance right now felt too big. A chance he wasn't willing to take.

  
They sat back down this time facing each other properly, Keith now holding one of Lance's hands in his to fiddle with. This was something that for the longest time he was ready to take to the grave. Many times he thought he would and now he was here about to tell this boy everything.

  
“Fuck ok listen”, he stumbled over his words, “I’ve thought about how to say this so many times but it just seems like every time I want to say them you do something unexpected”, he looked up for a second to see that Lance was watching him intently, he looked back at their hands, “at the show we were at, I didn’t even think about it. I knew exactly who I wanted to leave the most because, and don’t even question this for a second, I would always choose you. Not because I don’t want to spend time with you or don’t want you around, it’s the opposite really, but because you deserve it and I don’t know I guess I’m just really bad at talking because one second I’m ready to tell anyone that you are the worthiest of all people I know but maybe I’m just biased-“.

  
“-then why did you-“

  
“-Because you surprised me!”, his head shot up, staring into upset baby blues shimmering with tears, “Because I thought you’d choose Allura as you always do and then you came at me with all that soft eyed, soft voiced persona that is normally reserved for everyone but me!”

  
He was starting to doubt himself and his choice of words. He was trying to calmly explain the situation but the words kept tumbling out of his mouth. His gaze came back to the hand he was holding, the dark skin a contrast to his own that he would love to spent hours looking at.

  
“The things you said! I couldn’t believe it! Before I know what’s happening I throw an insult and it’s all back in this uncomfortable tension we have now to the point where I thought that that was the only thing we had left because our thing seemed so long gone and pathetic for me to hold onto it I know you don’t really like me the way you do with Allura and she seems to finally-“

  
Both Keith’s hand were gripped thight in Lances and as their gazes reconnected it almost felt like they had, too.

  
“Listen carefully to what I’m about to say,” Lance said, a glint in his eye so dangerous and inviting it swallowed Keith whole, “I can assure you that I am very much in love with you and have been for a long time and it’s shit that it took me so long to get my head out of my ass to prevent us from growing apart but if I’m getting this right the important thing right now is that you like me back, right??”

  
His smile was hesitant at first but once he could feel his own taking place Lance lit up like a Christmas tree. He glowed like a star that was only his to behold and cherish. It filled him with a slightly familiar warmth, just more.

  
“Keith come on, buddy. Is that it, I need you to say it.”

  
“I love you, too, Lance. So much you don’t even know”, Keith said breathless trying to get as close to him as possible.

  
“Oh I think I’ve got an idea, buddy”, he said as he leaned in all the way. Capturing the others lips in a way he’d only dreamt of doing.

  
And kissing Lance is so much more than Keith could have thought. It’s not just a press of lips it’s his warmth under his fingertips, it’s his breath on Keith’s face. It’s the way he can feel a little smile along with the movement of their kiss.

  
It’s this overwhelming happiness that he thought he was growing accustomed to around Lance but boy was he wrong.  
Their lips slotted together perfectly, a slow and reassuring pace, their hands holding onto each other to make sure the other is real.

  
As they lean back their noses brush and the moment Keith sees Lance's eyes again he knows he’s lost at sea because he cant for the life of him take his eyes off him.

  
They lean their foreheads together and just relish in observing the other, sometimes sharing another kiss or two and mostly exchanging soft ‘i love you’s as their hands intertwine.


End file.
